Freakshow Curious Elixirs

Four Freakshow flavors are designed to put you in mind of a proper, old-fashioned circus in almost every way. Only clowns are missing. Two of their flavors are over-the-top, just like a freak show act outside the big top, and delightfully so.

Their cartoon labels portray the irony of grotesque entertainment; of beauty and horror combined within a jovial, animated style. Here are those four flavors, sold in brown glass bottles, mainly by vendors of gourmet e juices.

Bed of Nails

This could have been a sharp flavor: citrus, for instance. Instead, the makers of Freakshow Curious Elixirs chose an unexpected blend of soft and sweet with a crunch. Bed of Nails mixes creaminess with butter and pecans into an ice cream flavor with a 60/40 ratio.

Fiji Mermaid

Barnum’s Feejee Mermaid was a dead primate wearing a mermaid tail. The obvious flavor for me, then, would be banana or seaweed. Instead, like the Feejee Mermaid, this bottle is all mixed up: old-fashioned ice cream sundae with strawberries, chocolate, and caramel.

Fire Eater

Freakshow gets literal. The only combo with this name that makes sense is cinnamon and menthol: a fiery blend and a tank cracker. Don’t fill your polycarbonate clearomizer with this one. Save Fire Eater for a Pyrex tank worthy of its goodness; a Kanger Subohm Plus or Aspire Nautilus, for instance.

Bearded Lady

If your lady was blessed in the follicular way, wouldn’t she avoid dribbling ice cream down her chin? The obvious dessert alternative would be pineapple upside down cake. Okay, that would leave crumbs in her beard, but not when it’s vapor.

Freakshow Curious ElixirsDetails about the Juice

Purchase 15-ml bottles for $12 or $13; 30 ml for $22. A 120-ml bottle can also be ordered in advance but will take a bit longer to package and reach your door.

Brown glass, by the way, protects juices from UV rays. Glass is inert and prevents any taint while also being suitably tough to handle a juice like Fire Eater.

Reviews indicate these are excellent liquids and that the company did well to limit their selection to just 4 really good ones. It’s just as well too: if they sell out and you have to wait, that’s the time to buy more affordable e liquids: $12 or $13 is a high price to pay, even if flavors are freakishly good.

Try to pick up at least one of each bottle at some point, though. Eventually, you will own a set of potentially collectible bottles.

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Fire Eater isn’t an unusual juice: lots of companies mix those two flavors to make a hot and spicy e liquid. The other three are less common. Pineapple is most popular as part of a tropical blend, maybe a fruit cocktail or pina colada. Seduce Juice, however, makes P’Napple Cake, Juice Mafia has created Pineapple Upside Down Cake, and there are a few others.

Zeus E Juice has created a blend reminiscent of Neopolitan Ice Cream. Not Too Shabby’s “Like a Sir” e juice combines butterscotch, sea salted caramel, and vanilla bean, also creating an ice cream sundae vape juice.